This past year has been an interesting one for sure. At this point last year I was contemplating new years resolutions. I finally decided on the resolution to allow the spirits to work through me, instead of me working against or through the spirits.
It was one heck of a year. I lost my apartment, my daughter and I moved in with a close family friend, I have made friends, and some friends have moved on, I started going back to college in order to better my life and provide better for my daughter.
Now I sit here contemplating my new years resolution for this up coming year which I don't normally announce until Kwanzaa...( I know, odd right? just seems fitting considering thats what it's traditionally for). I am going to announce it early though, because I have some stuff to say...
I know most people that read this probably do not want winded blogs, but bear with me...
this last year I made the resolution to allow the spirit to work for me to (in the words of a good friend of mine) "Float more, Steer less, Love more, Fear less". I feel as though I have come along way this year because of where I started and where I currently am, but I can't help but to feel like I lost a lot of things also. By things, I mean of course material possessions and friends mainly.
like I said, I lost my apartment, and my car, moved out of town and started to float. I gained sincerity, humor, a sense of humanness, and stability. In the laws of equivalent exchange, in order for this to happen, I had to lose my apartment, and my car in order to gain the ability to learn how to depend on others. This was not a conscience choice but rather one I embraced.
I now feel richer then I ever could have with any money in the bank at all. I feel wealthy for simply the experience, the chance to rebuild and make my life what I want it to be.
I feel blessed because the people that are in my life are here for a reason, we have something apparently to learn from each other. I have a roof over my head, food in my stomach, cloths on my back (when I have to), good company, and hot coffee...truly all of my needs have been met, and continue to be met. For that I am thankful for the goddess in aligning me with these energies.
This next year, I resolve to continue to float more, and steer less, love more and fear less, but this year I want to get better at practicing what I preach. I feel that it is my calling to not only be the stable rock in the lives of those around me but also to be a beacon in the fog for those that need it. It's not enough any more for me to float myself along, but now it feels right to start to help others feel the same joy, and daily blessings that I feel myself.